I feel stress and a since of panic around my boss

I have a boss she is a good person but I offend feel like she is not telling the truth or that she changes facts about past instructions, and turns it into me not listening to her she will then after a argument or debate check her facts offend resulting in her being wrong however she will never just say okay I was wrong but instead start to spin an answer as to make it appear we were both wrong or sometimes just flat our lie and make stuff up that justified her accusations of my doing something wrong as if I'm a moron offend I let her win but after words I fall into these panic attacks or major anxiety.. and I have timeframes were I'm completely shout down as a result. it s a great job and it pays really well so I can not just quit and move on I need help to manage my anxiety please help

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by: Judy

It really seems like your anxiety is to do with your boss being unpredictable and undermining, and never really knowing when that is going to happen next. Are you sure this is really a great job? Your boss sounds like a nightmare and it is not surprising that it creates a lot of anxiety for you. You have two choices. One is to stay where you are and somehow learn not to let your boss get to you and the other is to take a look around for another job.

You say your boss sometimes treats you as if you’re a moron. If you choose to stay perhaps it will help you to realise that, if her mistakes happen as often as you say, it sounds as though she really doesn’t want to look stupid in front of you! This suggests she’s pretty insecure. She knows she’s made a mistake, and she knows that you know. She may be feeling very anxious too!

You can certainly benefit by following some of the suggestions on this website and this will help you keep on top of your anxiety. But it’s important to know that your anxiety has a lot to do with your situation. It is quite understandable when there is always the threat of another attack from your boss at any moment. You can’t stop her from making mistakes and therefore you can’t stop her from trying to shift the blame on to you. It’s a bit like telling someone in a cage with a lion not to feel anxious.

I really wish you well - good luck.

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